to be thankful...

i just woke up and the day has yet to begin so i thought to write a bit before it gets crazy:) i have so many reasons to be thankful year after year. many of them are the same year after year and i know that sounds lame but i am so glad that many of them are the same. but there is always something new to add to the last:) thanksgiving is truly one of my favorite celebrations of the year. it is something we do year round, give thanks that is, and one day during the year we actually get together to share it together. i think it would take me hours and hours to write down all of the things i am grateful for so i will just hit a few main ones:)

i am grateful for a heavenly Father who loves me, forgives me, keeps me accountable, challenges me, and gives purpose to my life. i love that He makes everyday matter and that not a day goes by where even if it isn't the best He still makes sure that i know He is there.

i am grateful for the family He has provided for me. i am so blessed with the mom and pop that i have and wouldn't trade them for anything:) my mom is the reason that i am the girl i am today and my dad helped a bit too:) they have always been so encouraging and loving and that can be tough with six kids but the did it and continue to do it:) my three sisters and two brothers are the best five any person could ask for and i mean that with my whole heart. i am grateful that my relationship with them is growing and not fading and that the love within our circle of six is so wonderful!

i am grateful for the special boy in my life who will soon be my HUSBAND! that is so wild. i came from a place of being so against it and i am so glad that the Lord beat me at my own game:) i am so thankful that the Lord took the past almost seven crazy years and turned them into beautiful love. i am so grateful for zack and who he is as a person and that he loves the Lord and that if he had to, he would cross entire oceans to get to me...he has never said it verbally...eheheh... but his actions show it a million times. i am grateful that his love for me isn't getting old, it is getting stronger by the day. i am grateful that he wants to lead me and take care of me. i am just so thankful for us:)

i am thankful for the friendships i have in my life. i am so privileged to be able to call some of the people i know friends. i am grateful for the conversations, for the loyalty, love, and so many other things. i am glad that distance is not a factor in my friendships with those whom are far away. i am glad that those that are near desire to spend time with me and make the effort to do so. thank you friends:)

i am grateful for a home and all those other things but pray that i always remember others who are less fortunate. and to be joyful to always help where i can. i want to always remember that where much is given, much s required.

i hope you all have a blessed thanksgiving:)

how?

hello, hello:) i have had a few of you ask about how it happened so here it is. it was so lovely. zack did good. such a little sneak but i'm glad he can keep a secret! we had been trying to go up to solvang for a couple months now and for one reason or another, it just never happened. i think i was more bummed because i have been waiting years and years to go and it just wasn't happening. well, a couple weeks ago zack finally said that no matter what this weekend was the weekend we were going. i was on board just due to the past few months of trying and having no luck...so i really didn't think anything of it. last week we decided that we were going to go up on friday to stay with my sister in slo to avoid the 4am wake up call. good idea, roxi:)
after zack got off, we packed the car and headed out. it seemed like the longest drive ever but it was so lovely driving up the coast. i have never experienced that part of california before so it was new and i loved it. when we got to town, we emptied the car and headed to downtown slo. it is so lovely there. we had a terrific dinner at a neat restaurant. all locally grown food. yum. during dinner i got SICK. i should have known...whenever i plan something happens...big, small, doesn't matter, there is always something(good example...halloween...a few posts down:). our time in downtown was so sweet but a little short and i could tell zack was bummed but i couldn't help it. we called it a night soon after we got to the apt and zack and friend tim headed out. little did i know that they would spend the next few hours driving around slo looking for a nice spot for a proposal.
saturday i woke up at 6:30ish...i wasn't feeling well but i didn't care really. i got ready and zack and tim came to pick bec and i up. we left town at 7:45 and when we were driving to solvang, zack told me we would be stopping a few times because tim told him there were some fun photo spots on the way down. i knew another trip like this one would not come again any time soon so i was ok with the stops:) i was really loving the drive, it was my first time experiencing the california coast so you can imagine how much goodness it was for my heart. we passed by a sweet little park and i noticed it immediately...it was just sweet. a few exits away zack got off the freeway and backtracked. i didn't think anything because he let me know we would be stopping. he turned down a little street and there it was! the park i noticed when we were driving! it was even prettier so i was excited. we got out and walked down this little rocky path until we got to the end. there, we found two little wooden benches and a cliff that led to the most beautiful view of the ocean. the sun was just coming up so it was really golden out which made it that much better. along the bottom there were caves and off to the side a never ending pier. who knew that stuff existed here?!
zack started taking photos and he was having such a neat time. i was getting cold:) twenty minutes into our visit, silly me asked zack if i could wait in the car while he snapped a few shots...ehehehe:) he turned and asked me to stay with him. ten minutes later i asked again and that time he told me to suck it up:) so after asking if i could go grab my jacket he finally called me to stand by him and he gave me a hug. it was nice and WARM:) i felt him pulling away and i held on tighter because i was cold. he finally pulled me off, took my hand, and started talking about our time together...from the beginning. when he started doing that i got so excited because i love talking about our story. we have such a unique one and i love just talking to him about it. we don't get to do it often so the fact that he brought it up made me happy and i was ready to listen. it was like poetry:) but i was cold. my mind said, "so lovely but we can do this in the warm car..." oh goodness. i know i'm so ridiculous. i fought my thoughts back because i just loved what was happening and as soon as my thoughts left me alone zack got down on his knee! it was 8:10am...zack told me:) WOWZERS!
i started laughing as soon as it happened...really. i grabbed his head and pulled it into my tummy and i rocked him from side to side uncontrollably. seconds into laughing, i began crying...and loudly. luckily we were the only two people out there:) i think i was just overwhelmed. we have been on such a crazy journey together and the fact that we had reached that moment just completely melted me. i was really grateful that zack didn't rush me. he just waited and let me cry it out. he didn't move away from me for a bit until i finally settled down:) when he pulled away he was red at the face and teary and that was nice. he finished sharing his thoughts with me and pulled out a little box, opened it, and asked the big question! i said yes a million and one times. he finally interrupted me and said it was time to put the ring on. i was ok with that. what a lovely thing it is! and what makes it even better is the fact that the stone is a fourth generation diamond. one hundred years of goodness sitting on my finger:)
it was perfect. quiet, simple, lovely, very zack like. after taking a few photos, we headed over to the car. once we were settled in he reached to the back seat and pulled out a stack of wedding books and magazines:) we called the families and headed over to solvang. it was a very unexpected morning but what a neat way to experience solvang. we spent the morning/afternoon there doing everything. i loved every moment. at 1ish, my body was ready to go home so we took off. we got home to dinner and flowers....my mom is sweet:)
on sunday zack's mom came over and had a special package in hand....an old cigar box. it was filled with old letters and photographs...photos of women from the past wearing the same stone i have on my finger today. so good. i really enjoyed that time.
i think it is safe to say i had a very lovely weekend. i know i left out tons of details but i think you might hate me if you had to read more so i can always share in person or over the phone:)
and so it is:)

poetry

i love the stuff. i can't get enough of it. tonight we had an art opening at the shop and a group of about thirty poets came out to share their work. they all crammed into the back room, created a tiny stage, and to music, recited lovely creations. there was one woman who was lovely. i felt like my heart was going to jump out a few times when she was sharing. they were all brilliant. zack actually shared two pieces and they were just wonderful. he wrote one for me and it was lovely. it reminded me of years ago when we first met. he would come over to my apt, sit across from me, and read to me. i liked that:)

you're not going to believe it!

me and the beckster:)
solvang
is so lovely
the place
it happened

i am ENGAGED! really, REALLY friends:) i can hardly believe it myself but it is so true! it was the neatest and most unexpected thing and i am so thankful and excited. i actually have a friend who said, "wow, roxi o is getting married?!"...eh eh eh to that:) i will write more about the day another day but for now here are just a few shots from the day.

us:)

i'm not sick:)

well, i still have a tiny cough and scratchy throat BUT that is nothing. this past week and a few days has been so challenging for me. have to deal with a MONSTER flu can take a huge toll on any person no matter how super hero like they are...i am not one of those super hero ones:) anywho, i feel so great and this week has been so amazingly good thus far. there has been a couple bumps but even those bumps added to the goodness of this week. we have a Creator who is capable of making even the crummy things become not so crummy and i love that so much. sunday night zack and i went to rock harbor and it was so good. the pastor said something that i just can seem to shake. something so simple but so good. he said, "the worship you experience during your week should validate what you sing in the service on sunday." our everyday lifestyles should make our words we sing in church full and meaningful. how true and lovely is that picture. on top of a neat message i was able to see dear friends. friends that i don't get to see as often as i would like so seeing them was ultra enjoyable.
i can't really remember monday but yesterday was fun. work, nap and hang out with chris and nicole! it was my first time meeting nicole and she was super fun. plus a new skirt, tights, and nail polish from forever 21. everything amazingly priced so i don't feel bad:) funny story...i was looking at the nail polish trying to decide on which brown. i was holding the bottles by the tops and when i shook one the bottle flung of and hit the lady standing next to me...the top still in my hand...yikes! she jumped and i apologized and when she said all was well i walked away smiling. a little bit chuckling but at myself not the super sweet woman. today i helped my sister pack and move everything in her apt. she and her husband just bought a new home. we are having thanksgiving at their house:)
i am so looking forward to the weekend. zack and i are visiting my little sister in slo and after we will be having a day adventure in solvang! i have been waiting to go there for years now and it is finally happening and i am so excited! it should be fun. hope tonight is so fun for you:)

ps- i haven't been able to do much lately and today i looked at my phone and saw that i had messages. when i listened, the first thing i heard was,"you have SEVEN new messages." yikes! sorry friends, i will be calling you soon.

it could have been so much worse...

halloween that is. saturday morning was the most crummy part of this flu i am experiencing. and i just couldn't believe it especially because i spent so much time making my costume and zack's costume this year. i made zack's while watched great pumpkin...i really love charlie brown. i was so disappointed at the idea of not wearing them and fortunately zack said that was not an option...not wearing them, that is. so, we got dressed up, took a couple photos, made a couple quick stops and that was it. but it was so nice:) i am so glad we got to wear them. we ended the night by watching the fall, if you have not seen it, please watch it. the little romanian girl is the sweetest thing ever:) anywho, it was a really nice halloween even if i was sick. if you can't tell, we were owls. yay:)

zack made his hat and he had a hard time parting with it...this photo was taken the day AFTER halloween:)
thanksgiving, i am so ready:)

still sick..

i just can't believe it. i am with fever and in bed and it is just horrible. but i am not throwing up so it is not ultra horrible. please pray for me.

sort of sad/happy halloween...moslty.

yesterday, i came down with the stomach flu. i just don't know why but boy oh boy, does it suck. when it first came about, it was just a fever. a couple hours into it, it finally broke and i was so happy. zack and i had a wedding to go to so since my fever broke and i was feeling mostly ok, i wanted to go. to support our friends, to see our friends, and to see cael in a tux:) i made it through the ceremony which was just beautiful but we had to leave soon after because the blasted flu was on the attack. i had a little sprite to calm my tummy but on the way to the car, my tummy decided it couldn't keep the sprite in:( oh gosh, it was such a disaster.
i finally fell asleep last night but my stomach woke me up bright and early at 6am this morning. normally i am ok with waking up early...it was the fact that the toilet was calling my face that was the problem. I was so upset when i woke up feeling sick because i made my halloween costume this year and i was going to wear it to a fun party and i knew all of that was not going to happen if i was still ill this morning...and i did. anywho, my morning nastiness lasted until about 10:30am. i spoke to my friend erika, who is a nurse, and she recommended pedialyte and i was so surprised but so happy once i got it. thank you erika. it doesn't taste completely horrible and the throwing up has stopped...hopefully for good.
i won't be doing anything fun tonight which is mostly sad since i love halloween but i am so thankful that i am feeling better.
i hope you have such a happy halloween. be safe and eat tons of candy. it's totally ok tonight:)

pain...

today i felt physical pain in a way i have never felt before and it was completely miserable. i woke up this morning and did my workout which was wonderful. i showered, got ready, and went over to zack's for lunch. we had a really neat study from philippians, we went for a bike ride, and after we went for lunch at panera which was great. i know, you are probably wondering where the pain comes in...here it is. when lunch was over we went back to zack and jame's home and i was sleepy so i laid down for a nap on the top bunk. bad idea. when i woke up from my nap, i got up ultra fast and i bonked my head on the ceiling and when i say bonked, i mean BONKED. it beat the time i was smashed in the face by a tennis ball. it was loud and painful and it was ten minutes before i had to go into work. i set my alarm to wake me just before my 2:00 shift:( my head hurt so bad, so work was a bit tough tonight. my head feels like it is going to roll right off of my neck. i know it isn't but it is the biggest ouch i have experience in a long time, maybe ever. lesson learned...don't EVER take the top bunk. overall, my day was still lovely. i hope yours was as well. sweet dreams ahead.

ps...i know it is silly, but please pray for my head:)

new...

zack just launched a new photo blog and it is wonderful and you should look. it is not full yet but he will be posting more in the days to come which is super exciting. if you ever need someone to snap a few shots, he would be a neat pick:)