walking next to you...

alright, so i know this is number three blog of the day but oh well. when i write papers, i find myself looking for ways out... this is one of the ways. i feel as if it has been way too long since last writing about my life happenings. this came to me after reading Jessi's blog... oh what a good one it is, and oh how i wish i could be in florida with her so often. so, here is the latest. life is chaos, if i could think of a more subtle term to use i would but there isn't one. i graduate in may and this whole process leading up to that day is slowly ruining my life....ok, so maybe a little overdramatic... but only a little. i have papers to write and i am finding myself completely unmotivated. i think the only thing that makes this whole thing even worse is that everything is due by the 18th of april... my brain has been screaming at me these past few days... literally. I had to take meds to help me sleep last night... no, i am not a believer in medicated sleep but i had to make an exception. I applied to three phd programs and found out i did not get into two.... i have not heard from the third. these things can really tear a person down. i know we are told that we need to stay above the water but don't we all feel like we are drowning at one point or another? or is it just me? i have been finding myself in a panic these past few days and it has to be one of the most terrible feelings. one thing i know for certain, is that it is during these times that the Lord shows Himself in the truest ways. it is in our weaknesses that He is made strong and i know that it is so easy to pass those types of statements off as cliche, and you know why... because most of the time, they are! but then, here and there, we find that they are the most honest statements because we fall and he is the only one who can gather the pieces and restore the brokenness. i hate times like these but i appreciate them even more.  it isn't that things completely suck even though it may sound like they do, because they really don't, it is just that sometimes we go through tough times. and if you tell me you don't, i will choose not to believe you.

i know this is unusual, but i am irritated with my...macbook. i just purchased one a few weeks ago and yes, i do believe it was a good investment...but i just can't seem to figure things out...for instance, why my photos refuse to upload. that is currently the big issue. so to make up for my lack of photos, here is something someone posted that i borrowed....

so, roxana really is an interesting name. tonight i decided to type my name into the google search and here is what i found: there is a village called roxana in illinois!!! this place was named after a queen from the netherlands which is amazing because the netherlands is my favorite place in the world. i always knew there was something special about illinois...i mean, it has always just had this special place in my heart...now it makes plenty of sense:) when typing roxana into the search the first thing that showed up was: roxana school district and roxana high school....ahahaha:) so i wikipediad this thing and here is what i learned:

Roxana is a village in Madison County, Illinois, United States. The population was 1,547 at the 2000 census. A majority of the land in Roxana is taken up by the Wood River Conoco-Phillips oil refinery; the refinery was built and originally owned by Shell Oil and has also been owned by Premcor. As of December 2005, the Refinery refines 306,000 barrels of oil per day to produce gasoline, jet fuel, diesel, asphalt, propane and other products, and supplies part of the St. Louis region, Chicago, Indiana and Ohio.

Roxana is considered to be part of the Riverbend or Metro East area, including Alton, East Alton, Godfrey, Rosewood Heights, Bethalto, Wood River, Hartford and South Roxana. Roxana is known for its smell, being located in the midst of four oil refineries. It is also well-known for its bright Christmas lights, lining Illinois Route 111, its main street, throughout the holiday season each year. The zip code for Roxana is 62084.

In 1918, the Shell Oil Company opened its Wood River Refinery in what was then called Wood River Field, an area south of the City of Wood River. As houses began being built close to the refinery, the population there grew to the point that in 1921, this unincorporated area became the incorporated Village of Roxana.

Originally constructed on 336 acres, the refinery now covers 1888 acres, and is the largest in the ConocoPhillips system.

Local lore is that the name Roxana was chosen to honor Queen Roxanne of the Netherlands, inasmuch as the village owed its very existence to state owned Royal Dutch Shell. That seems unlikely, however, as there has never been a Queen Roxanne of the Netherlands. The Dutch monarch at the time was Wilhelmina of the Netherlands. More likely, the town owes its name to Roxana, one of the wives of Alexander the Great.

A Baptist Church was organized in September 1921, and the land where the current First Baptist Church of Roxana now stands at the corner of Tydeman Street and Central Avenue was purchased in early 1922. The first services were held there on December 3, 1922. J.A. Wilson served as the church's first pastor.

A formal Village Hall, called for by a vote for a "Municipal Building," was built on bonds in 1938. It currently houses Roxana's Village President, Treasurer, Water Department, and Clerk's offices, the fire and police departments, the Village board room, and a municipal gymnasium.

In the early 1940s, a large art deco style theater was built at the northwest corner of Thomas Street and Central Avenue, at 400 N. Central Avenue. To the south across Thomas Street lay Burbank School built in 1936, and cattecorner at the southeast corner lay Roxana Drug Store.

Seating approximately 580 people, the theater was originally designed for vaudeville acts as well as movie showings. In 1949, a tornado tore the roof off, but after repairs were made, the theater reopened. In the late 1960s, it was closed for nearly two years before being sold in June 1968 from the estate of Albert Critchlow to Bloomer Amusement Co. of Belleville. It was thereafter operated as BAC Cine for many years. In 1992, the Cine was purchased by Kerasotes Theatres, Inc., of Springfield, Illinois, which operated it until its closing in February 2002.

In 2000, the theatre was purchased from Kerasotes and was donated to the Roxana Church of the Nazarene, which is located just north of the theatre. The Church now operates the building as the Nazarene Community Center, where it is available for rental and group events.

how terrific, eh? i know boredom lead to this but looking back, i have no regrets:) ahahahaha:) special thanks to google search and wikipedia...it is never ok to use this source for research:)

ok, so first off, it has been quite some time since my last blog. i do not know exactly how long but certainly long. anywho, i hate zucchini...there is just something about it that does not satisfy. but i like this photo...a few months ago i went to riverside for a day of photo fun with a friend... :)
i have not been spending a whole lot of time taking photos lately and it saddens me because it is something i enjoy. i was looking through some old photos and this on captured my attention. this piece of paper was on a table where a clown had her paint set up because she was a face painter. she had a cotton candy pink wig on her head and the smile on her face even had me convinced...i almost jumped in line to ask for a butterfly or a unicorn or something. now i am not one for that type of what ever one might call it but she was so pleasant. the type of person one could just sit back and watch all day....in a not creepy way.
this week was interesting...i might write about it next week...when this week has passed.
this is a list of my most unfavorite things...just because:)
-bananas
-olives
-beer
-country music
-sound of music
-zucchini
-horror films
-football
-lifted trucks...and sometimes, the arrogant bros driving them.

over and out.

i finished the semester today!!!! ya! it was a terrific class followed by the most terrific day:)
this one is short because my eyes are stinging...because i am a bit tired:)
over and out.
ps...tomorrow i am delivering my application packet to ucla!